The following post was submitted by Keith Daniels. You can check out more of his articles at his website First Rate Fitness.
Most guys don’t approach girls at the gym. Instead they’ll go out to clubs and bars where the competition is fierce, girls have their bitch shields up, and they may have to pay a cover. What these guys should realize is that you don’t have to go out of your way to meet attractive girls- they’ll be at the gym. And if you go 4-5 times a week then they’ll be plenty of opportunities for you.
Personally I’m never the tallest or most jacked guy in the gym, but I’m still able to date some of the most attractive girls from the gyms I’ve gone to. And over the years I’ve fine-tuned my approach and created a system. I’m confident that my system works, and it will give you great results if you put in the effort.
You may not think it’s worth the risk to approach in the gym. You could get rejected and have to keep seeing the girl at the gym. But approaching is 100% worth the risk. A lot of these girls are single and interested in meeting someone. Any half decent gym will have attractive girls, and fitness girls are pretty ideal- they keep in shape and they try to improve their bodies. If you get rejected then that’s fine, you’ll still live.
The approach itself isn’t too difficult. You want to do it during your workout while your blood is flowing and your muscles are pumped. But you don’t want to get too pumped up because you need to be in control and able to think properly. The goal with the approach is to get her number and quickly finish up with your workout.
Once you see a girl alone that you like, then you go over and make the approach. Walk over to her confidently, and don’t shy away from eye-contact.
I prefer to go with a direct opener for two big reasons. Number one is that it’s bold, and girls like bold approaches- especially in places where hormone and endorphin levels are higher. Number two is that it gets right to the point, and you’ll be able to know within minutes whether the approach worked or not. It’s a time saver, and it doesn’t disrupt either of your workouts. I’m sure indirect openers can work too, I just haven’t used them much.
As for specific lines, it doesn’t matter much what you say. It’s more about how you come across- confident, relaxed, and in-control. Here are some samples openers that work well:
“Hey I saw you from over there and you looked cute so I thought I would come over and say hi”
“Hey you look nice, what’s your name?”
Also, if you’re in decent shape then you’ll often get IOI’s (indicators of interest) when working out. IOIs make things easier, and when you receive one from a hot girl then you have to take advantage of the opportunity. There’s much less chance of rejection after an IOI.
The Follow-Up Text
This part is key. The goal with the followup is to set a time for you to meet back at the gym. That’s right, it will be a gym date. This is because it’s convenient for both of you, and she’ll be a lot less likely to flake. So after you get the number then send her a text later that day, or the following day. Here’s an example of an initial text:
“Hey Sarah this is Keith. It was nice meeting you at the gym today”
Then when it’s time to ask for a meetup, you can send this:
I’m going to the gym tomorrow around the same time. Do you want to meetup there?
If she’s not available then you can try to pick another date.
For the gym meetup, you don’t necessarily have to workout together. You can if you want, but chances are you’re not going to be working the same muscle groups or doing the same exercises. Usually what happens is that you’ll do a few exercises together but the majority you will do on your own. You can talk to your girl in-between sets. This creates a push-pull dynamic where you give her attention by flirting with her, but then you take that attention away by leaving her to do your sets. She’ll respect the fact that you’re dedicated to the gym, and that you’re not making her the priority.
I recommend that you try doing abs with her. You can incorporate a lot of touching which will make her more comfortable around you. After the workout you can make plans for another day or you can try to bounce her to wherever you want. From here you can decide how you want to play it.
So that’s the system. If you put in the approaches and follow the basic guidelines, then you’re going to have success with fitness girls.